I’m not ready yet

I know we don’t know the day or the hour but I can’t help thinking the end of the world isn’t to far away. All one needs to do is look around to see the signs that are talked about throughout scripture. And I am scared.

“But take heed to yourselves lest your hearts be weighed down with dissipation and drunkenness and cares of this life, and that day come upon you suddenly like a snare;  for it will come upon all who dwell upon the face of the whole earth. But watch at all times, praying that you may have strength to escape all these things that will take place, and to stand before the Son of man.”

Luke 21:34–36 (RSV2CE)

I also know I will never know if I am right or wrong, after all, if the world ends tomorrow, well I won’t be here, nor will you. But it isn’t the end that scares me. It’s that I am not ready for it. Jesus teaches us to be ready for it, to live our lives as if each day is our last, and to be ready to go to Heaven. There are too many things I need to do and fix before I can go. There are too many things left undone.

To be clear it isn’t me I am worried about. Whatever my fate is I accept it. I know my life is in God’s hands. I know He has a plan for me, I don’t know exactly what it is, but I accept it and do my best to discern it so I can live it. But it is for those around me that I am concerned, especially those I love. I have failed in raising my children, and as a result my grandchildren in the faith, not just in the Catholic faith but any faith. I don’t know how to make them see as I do that every thing they have is because God has blessed them with it.

I know it took me years to see this. I refused to see it. I didn’t even try to see it. But now I do see it and as a result hopefully if the end does come tomorrow, I am ready. But I don’t think my children and grandchildren are.

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